Posts by Jeff Nicely:

A friend is grieving the loss of her mom.

Another friend just had to put her puppy to sleep.

And another friend is battling illness.

I find it somewhat easy to mourn with those who are mourning but when it comes to celebrating with those who celebrate, I’m not very good.

A neighbor passed me in the lobby and with great excitement declared, “My taxes are done and I’m so relieved.”

Being the good guy I am I replied, “Wow that’s awesome. Way to go!!”

But my inside voice really said…

“Way to go Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes. Rub it in!”

I was jealous.

Choosing to be mindful of my moments in life, this moment gave me an opportunity to sit in quietness and think.

What I discovered made me uncomfortable.

Why do I find it easier to mourn with those who are mourning but internally I fail at celebrating with those who celebrate?

Could it be that problems play so well with my “let me fix it” narrative?

Or could it be that when others are down I feel better about my life?

Maybe it’s really that I have a level of compassion for people.

But when people celebrate, sometimes I feel jealous.

Sometimes I want to one up the person with my own success story just to prove I have something to celebrate.

I’ve been learning that it’s ok to be present with my successes and my failures.

And because I’m learning to be ok with it, I’ve made it a goal to lean into my weaknesses and my failures, seeing them both as normal parts of my life.

Leaning into this moment of jealousy, I learned that I’m living out my subconscious programming.

I’m reacting to people and situations with little to no thought.

I want to be a better person and better starts with an honest recognition of where I am in life.

Better calls me to forgive myself for those moments of jealousy.

Better reminds that I must think, act, and live like I’ve forgiven myself.

Better invites me to form new habits.

Out of my awareness, I’m choosing to seek out people who are mourning as well as people who are celebrating.

And when I find them, I’m choosing to listen carefully to their stories.

I’m forming the habit of seeing the situation through their eyes.

And when they celebrate, I’m going to put my heart into honestly celebrating with them.

Oh, and if I don’t get all this right the first time, I’m going to have enough patience and grace with myself to move on until I get better at my new habit.

I’m forming this new habit because when I got quiet, this idea came to my mind.

By forming new habits, I change.

When I change, life gets better for everyone around me.

You’re reading this message because you want to be inspired to live a life that makes a difference.

Be quiet.

Listen to what your heart and mind tell you.

Forgive yourself.

Be gracious with yourself.

Let your past be forever in your review mirror and let your eyes be always on the goal of living your best life today.

Jeff

Living My Best Today

I recently wrote an email that encouraged you to BE.

Living My Best Today

I watched as a young guy with long hair and work clothes talked with a homeless man on the side of the street.

I couldn’t believe a twenty something guy would bother. Everything I’ve heard about this generation tells me they ain’t got it in them.

But what happened next moved me.

The young guy walked across the street and into McDonalds before reappearing with a bag full of food and a drink for the homeless guy.

With a smile on his face, the homeless guy looked like he’d just received a prize. Someone noticed him.

When I get too preoccupied with life, I fail to notice the people and opportunities around me.

Something as simple as a smile, a thank you, an email, a text, a phone call, or a gesture that says, “You go first” makes a difference.

Yet we’re quick to discount these as too small to matter so we don’t bother. But that’s an excuse.

The last few years have proven that we’re lonely. We’re scared. Things are consuming our minds to the point we feel like giving up.

Then comes the email.

The text arrives.

The phone rings.

The invite comes in the mail.

The friend shows up.

Our spirit is lifted and for a second, we feel alive. Someone thought of us and we feel valued.

The next time you think it’s only the big things that matter in life, think again.

You have what it takes to make a difference in someone’s life today.

This is your opportunity to walk across the street and make someone’s day.

I’m glad I witnessed that young man making a difference. I hope to hear that you make a difference as well.

Go For It!!
Jeff

Living My Best Day

I went to the auto repair shop to have my car looked at for a possible repair. I’d had my car at this place several times before.

I walked in on a situation.

The owner was publicly berating three of his employees with no concern for anyone in the building.

Several months ago I decided to take my environments seriously.

If the environment isn’t positively adding to my life, I change my environment.

This repair shop was an ongoing negative environment.

So I changed environments. I never went back.

Environments either energize you and build you up or they pull you down and drain you.

You live, sleep and work in an environment.

Too much chaos, clutter and disorganization and you’ll find yourself exhausted just looking at it.

You associate with people who make up environments.

Too many negative attitudes, complaints, fault-finding and you’ll find yourself sinking into despair.

Communities are environments because they take on personalities and mindsets that are obvious if you pay attention.

Some people and some communities are competitive, negative and operate from a scarcity mindset.

Others are full of energy and see the possibilities all around them.

If you find yourself sinking emotionally, check your environments.

Two days ago I took my car to a new location within the same company I had left.

The guy who checked in my car was friendly, pleasant, and seemed to actually like his job.

The owner was behind the counter noticeably encouraging his employees.

I actually heard him tell two different employees, “Thanks for a great job today. I’m glad you’re here!”

When the pizza and subs arrived, I found out this was a regular occurrence. The owner takes care of his employees.

When I was handed my keys, the owner asked how satisfied I was with the time it took to work on my car.

By changing this one environment, my life is less stressful.

Overwhelmed by stress, clutter, negativity, and demanding people?

Check your environments and see what needs to change.

Take care of yourself so you can make a difference.

Be kind.

Be happy.

The world needs the best of you right now.

Jeff

Living My Best Today